I went to the cinema the other night only to find some people sat in the very seats I had carefully chosen from the kiosk screen! It was a 3D Imax screen we had booked and the tickets weren’t cheap; plus I was delivering a promise this day, a promise to my girlfriend that we would finally watch the sequel to the hobbit – “The Desolation of Smaug” – and watch it in style!
I was stood at the edge of the cinema with more popcorn, drink and snacks than anyone (even a man) can reasonably be expected to carry, building myself up for the forthcoming confrontation over the carefully chosen seats, when I realised my girlfriend was missing all the drama… she had disappeared off to the ladies while I was buying popcorn and agreed to meet me… meet me…. um… where did she say to meet me again?
I went back to the foyer and waited for her there, perhaps we had passed each other in the crowds? But all I could think about as I watched people disappearing into the different screens of the cinema was the audacity of the people sitting in our seats. How dare they! And this wasn’t the first time I’ve had this problem either. Weighed down with so much popcorn I was unable to retrieve my ticket from my pocket to confirm the seat numbers, so I would have to wait for my girlfriend anyway. But I remembered the location of the seats perfectly, they gave perfect access to the aisle, so I could stretch my legs during the long film, and use the toilets if necessary.
10 minutes passed, and by now I was late for the start of the film, angry and spilling popcorn in my frustration! When suddenly my girlfriend tapped me on the shoulder. “Where have you been?” she asks. “Me?” I reply, “I’ve already been in once, and I’ve been waiting here for ages for you!” I exclaim. “Anyway, forget that, do you know there are some people sat in our seats? and the place is now packed” I say pointing angrily at the screen entrance.
She gives me that look of both pity, and disappointment… “that is screen 3,” she says, “we are at screen 4” Over her shoulder I finally see the words “3D IMAX CINEMA” in foot high letters, the only one in the whole cinema complex… “I’ve been sat in our seats waiting for you for 10 minutes and the place is empty,” she adds.
“Do you want some of this popcorn?” I ask her. As we walk in I wonder how I nearly had a huge argument in the wrong cinema and how long it would have taken me to realise I was watching the wrong film. Perhaps the distinct lack of hobbits might have given it away in the end. I do have an excuse for this easy mistake though; since I’ve been writing for a hobby my mind has been full of ideas for stories of my own, so I cant be expected to come up with great ideas, and be on the ball all of the time? that would be ridiculous…